Ah yes, I remember the Lettuce Eat It routine (one of Al's best). I looked forward to getting home from Centennial Elementary and watching Al and the 3 Stooges. Then suddenly it was commercial time and I think it went something like this:
AL: Hey gang, we have my favorite person in the studio, Les come over here.
LES: Hello Al, I brought you something from Lesterburgers and it's still warm (Al turns to the camera with a knowing smile).
AL: My goodness, what's that green stuff? (hoping against all hope that it will be different this time).
LES: We'll get to that in a minute Al, but first I want you to take a look at this fresh golden bun with lots of delicious sesame seeds!
AL: Yes that looks good Les, but what about this green thing here? (point to the lettuce for the first of many times).
LES: And Al, take a look at that all meat paddy in the center. Doesn't that look great?
AL: Yes it does Les, but right now I'm really interested in what you call this stuff here (points to the lettuce again).
LES: Well Al, before we get to that, observe these fresh sliced tomatoes that we just put on (Les lifts the bun).
AL: Those do look great Les, but help me out here - what do you call this (points to the lettuce and this time makes a silly grin).
LES: Did you notice that we also include some nice freshly sliced onions, you do like onions don't you Al?
AL: Please, please - I'm going crazy with hunger here, WHAT DO YOU CALL THE GREEN STUFF? (Al raises his voice)
LES: Al please, one last thing. I want to point out our secrete sauce that we are very proud of at Lesterburgers. I made it myself just before I came in to the studio!
AL: For the love of gawd Les! What do you call this lovely shredded green thing right here? (point to the lettuce a final time).
LES: Well Al ........
AL: YES, YES? (Al is now practically drooling all over the bun).
LES: Well, it's, it's ...........
AL: (now wide eyed and completely focused on the Lesterburger)
LES: That's the lettuce.
AL: Well then! (Al looks directly at the camera, with the kookest grin ever)
AL: LETTUCE EAT IT! (devours a huge bite and then freezes as if the it were shot on film but they are still shooting live).
.... heh, heh. Miss you Al!